Broken Memories
by ChampionOfKirkwall
Summary: Broken memories; some intertwined. How will the return of said memories affect the developing relationship between Elf and Mage? "Why was I never told! It could have changed everything!" The beginning of the story takes place after the Qunari invasion, but before the start of the final act. /Non Bioware cannon/ Enjoy!
1. Chapter 1

Marian Hawke was a mage. She was a beautiful mage. A talented mage. But, even though she was one of said 'hated beings,' her life hadn't been that bad. Well - with the exception of a few...mishaps. For example: The Arishock killing the Viscount, him trying to take over Kirkwall and the tragic death of her mother. But hey - that's life.

She was currently sitting in the local brewery, having a plesant 'chat' with her favourite Dwarf, Varric Tethras.

"Hawke, i'm telling you. No one can resist the ol' Varric charm."

" Oh I agree," the liquid swirled as she manovered the glass in circular motions, a look of ammusmant playing on her features. "My bodie's just tingling over the thought of you ravashing me."

"It's the chest hair isn't it?" Varric pulled at the open collar of his shirt with one hand, giving a flamboyant wave with of the other. "Nobody can resist the chest hair"

" Even Sebastian would give up his chaisen life just to have you for one night."

" I would pay to see him try" The friendly story teller replied, chuckling to himself. Suddenly, his eyes dimmed. "Hawke I've been meaning to ask..." Varric's posture turned defencive, like he was preparing to take striking information directly to the heart. "Who's side will you take? You know, when it comes down to it."

Marian took a seat and ordered another pint; she had a feeling she'd need it.

"Varric... Merideth is crazy. That much is certain. My father was a mage, My sister was a mage; I'm a mage - So are two of my closest companions. I can't take the templar side, even if my 'darling' brother is one. Maker, when thinking about it, if I did take their side, who's telling what Merideth will do to me when it's over. The right of anulment calls for every mage in the area to be destroyed. Not one should be left alive. In conclusion my dearest Dwarf, I would have to take the side of the mages. To many innocent lifes would be at stake. I have to protect them, Champion or no."

"Thank you for not giving me a heart attack, Hawke. The consequences may be severe, but morally, it's the right choice. Though…" Varric shot a concerned look at his friend, and placed a large, clumsy hand on her forearm. "…What about him? What will you do if-"

"He won't."

"But Hawke, you know he-"

"He won't, Varric. Trust me. If he did-"Hawke was a strong woman, but she had a hard time blinking back the tears that welled in her eyes. "- If he did…I would decide at that time. Right now, I don't want to speculate with if's and but's."

"I understand Chuckles; trust me. I do."


	2. Chapter 2

"Hey Elf! Duck!"

Fenris bent at the knees, his opponent's weapon clipping the top of his ear. He swept his sword in a flurry, beneath them, ripping their ankles apart.

"Thanks for the heads up-"

"FOOORE!"

The Tevinter warrior jumped, startled, then froze as a large object sped past his head, hitting his companion's shield.

"What in Andraste's name was that?" Aveline questioned, as the severed Herlock's head fell at her feet.

Hawke hopped over the rock barrier that was separating her from her fellows. "What?" she asked, sarcastically when she landed. "He said 'heads up.'" The mage smirked, mounting her staff and winking in Fenris' direction. "Why? Did I startle you brave, brave warriors?"

"I'm just glad you have good aim."

"Would you have expected anything less, Varric?"

The Elf stared at his "team leader" with frustration filled eyes. _'How can she be so cheerful?'_ he thought, never being able to understand it. She has been through so many horrifying moments over the past 4 years; any one of them could render any normal person traumatised for life. Yet, she never talks to anyone about it. Hawke had a wall, and Fenris knew it.

"Hey! Glow stick! Hurry it up!" Hawke called, jokingly, waving her arms about like a lunatic, whilst standing by the cave's entrance.

"Hawke..."

Varric chuckled excessively, admiring them both. "Haha! Priceless!"

"Let's be on our way, Hawke. Some of us have work to do," Aveline interrupted the Dwarfs needless chortle. They began their way back to the city of chains, while some member's minds were on more pressing matters.

* * *

A loud crash bounced off the walls as a vase made contact with the bedroom door. Menacing, raspy, stress filled bellows rang through the old Amell estate. Raven black hair and brown finery clothing flowed as the exasperated woman made use of the fragile objects in the immediate area, to deal with her pent up emotions. Hawke had snapped. She couldn't take it.

Following the disintegration of yet another copy of Anders' manifesto, Marian fell onto her bed, wrapping her dainty, magical fingertips around her pillow, burying her crying face in it's comforting feathers. _'Why must it come to this?'_ She thought. _'Why must I brake now?'_

Hawke guessed that it was because she was alone, for the first time in a while. There was no one in the house at all, aside from her. She had time to let lose.

She was going to weep until she could weep no more. Hawke despised anyone seeing her that way. She was and always will be a strong, independent woman who can fight her own battles – all battles, but her internal ones. Light drained from the world around her. She finally rested her worn out body, tired from the strain her emotions placed upon her.

Little time passed before a weighted figure beside Hawke caused her to awake from her slumber, opening her eyes only to see two dazzling emerald green orbs dancing in the dark, full of emotions she could not place.

"You do this a lot, don't you?" Fenris asked rhetorically, "This is your resolve?" He looked down at her, and ran his fingers through her short black hair in a comforting notion for which he was shocked he knew.

Hawke raised her wilting frame to face him properly. Had she forgotten to lock the door? 'Impossible' she thought. Even if she had done so, Bodahn always remembers to do so when he arrives.

"Orana let me in, Hawke – in case you were wondering."

_'He knows me to well.'_ She made a mental note not to be so obvious in the future. It was a wonder to her how this man could fathom exactly how she worked – every mechanism of her being.

"Would you like to…talk about it?" Fenris stammered, following his instincts and what he had been taught over the past four years – compassion.

The ruby lips of the mage were coloured by blood; bitten with stress. She sat up and draped her weakened arms around the Elf's broad shoulders, following with a simple "later" before continuing to show once hidden emotions which inhabited her tears.

Fenris wrapped his lyrium embedded arms around her small frame, proceeding to rub the centre of her back, shushing away her tears. He was there for her, now. No one could hurt her anymore. The affection deprived man felt a strong need to protect Hawke. That it feels in itself was a surprise.

It took the Elf a time to notice that his broken companion had fallen asleep in his arms. Not wanting to break her trust, battle his emotions nor push his luck, Fenris laid her down on the bed, then got to the floor, resting his back against the foot of said bed.

**_He was her emotional bodyguard. _**


	3. Chapter 3

Elvan eyes opened due to invading light manoeuvring through the barred windows. He looked to the bed to see a slender frame missing from its covers. After getting up from his comfortable position, he exited the room en route downstairs, towards the study.

Hawke stared, captivated by the flickering flames of her grand fireplace. Her eyes followed every illuminating gleam of yellow and amber; to the glinting sparks that came after. "I awoke to a lovely surprise this morning," She announced, turning to face the man about to knock on her door. A conniving smirk crossed her lips. "I opened my eyes to see a dashing young Elf asleep at my bed's foot. Why he decided to stay the night I do not know."

Fenris' directed his attention to the abundance of hexagonal floor tiles, bashfully. Hawke just smiled. "Though I am thankful he did. Thank you Fenris – for everything."

"Always a pleasure," Fenris replied, full of honour and hidden euphoria, now fixing his gaze on the woman before him.

A few seconds of awkward silence past before Hawke decided to break it. "So Fenris, Have you decided what you will be doing in the up-coming years?"

The Elf contemplated his reply for a time, choosing his words carefully. "I have found the 'right reasons' we discussed before…" He stroked his chin, averting his eyes once more. "…The reasons for which I may stay in Kirkwall."

Marian Hawke appeared utterly elated.

"I have chosen to remain at your side. I have weighed the pros and cons, but have decided that it may be amusing to stick around. Considering all the trouble you get yourself into, you may need someone to save your life," Fenris finished with a snide expression on his face.

Hawke returned his look with a sly smile. "Drinks at the Hanged Man later?"

"Never miss them."

* * *

"Dang it Elf. Three serpents? I swear you are the luckiest man I have ever met."

"I guess that makes me the victor." A mischievous expression flashed over Fenris' face, as he took his winnings off the table.

"Heh! And to think, I thought you were bluffing!" Varric patted the warrior on the back in defeat, laughing away the thought of his lost coin.

'_He has no idea how he won.'_ Hawke chuckled to herself, eyeing the pair from the bar. She finished her drink and turned her attention to the scantily clad pirate beside her. "I will never understand why we still drink the swill in this place."

"I've told you before Hawke, it's an acquired taste." Isabela placed her glass on the counter. "Now seriously, how are you?"

"What do you mean?"

"You know what I mean. You have been so stressed lately and that painful expression does your looks no justice." The Rivaini woman stared at her friend with concern in her eyes.

" I'm fine Isabela; it's all okay now."

"And what…" She glanced towards the wicked grace table, where Anders was reluctantly giving up his sovereigns. "…Or should I say who made it 'all okay?'"

Hawke rolled her eyes. A faint smile rested on her lips. "Isabela…" she breathed, "Why must you always ask questions that you already know the answer to?"

"Ah, so it was him! How did he do it? Did he… waltz into your bed chambers, oiled and glistening, ready for you to take out your stress with moans of sexual desire? Did he…"

"Isabela!"

"What? That's how I would calm down." A devious expression was worn with pride on Isabela's devilish features, which quickly turned into a look of relief. "I'm glad you have someone to cry to, Hawke."

"Who said I cried?"

"Your response speaks for itself."

Hawke cupped her forehead, and sighed in acquiesce. _'Can't help but love her' _she thought. "Isabela, I am fine. I have found a way to resolve my emotional battles."

"How shrinky of you," The busty pirate chuckled - her eyebrow raised. "Fine, have it your way, Hawke. But, let me tell you this." She leant her frame forward so her lips softly touched the mage's ear. "If you don't bed him, I will." With that, Isabela turned, and swaggered her way toward her fellow companions, intending to be dealt in.

"Oh Isabela…" Hawke shook her head and folded her arms in contemplation. _'There is no way to fool that woman.'_

"Well that was entertaining."

Sparks of lightning shot out of the mage's fingertips as she jumped, startled by the sudden voice behind her. She turned to face the culprit, only to find a tall, slender figure, covered in leather and metal plate.

"Oh Maker!" she bent at the knees and grasped her heart, in order to regain her composure. "I swear you enjoy sneaking up on me"

"Your accusations wound me." Sarcasm radiated off his growling voice. "Glistening, huh?" The Elf snickered under his breath. "She has an obsession with that, it seems."

Blood raced to Hawkes cheeks, flushing her pale complexion with colour. Fenris had been standing there for a long time, it appeared. She recalled the rest of her conversation with the cunning rogue; her eyes widened with realisation. _**Isabela planned this.**_

"So, you heard everything?"

"Every word."

"Oh," She looked down at her greaves in embarrassment, fiddling with the knuckles of her gauntlets.

"I'm also glad that you have someone to cry to, Hawke."

Hawke looked up suddenly in surprise, quickly locking her gaze with his. She saw a gleam of care in his eyes before he turned to walk away.

"Thank you, Fenris…" She whispered through ruby lips, quietly to the wind.

And, the Elf smiled.


End file.
